Samantha Taylor 

Justification of love

When you give, it gets something in your heart, whether it is a tear.or anything of the nature, Over the course of several months I see people everywhere, they show their lights on in their car, they pass by in the stations, they smile and underneath the tone of their lips, they say thank you. The commercials these days seem to be incorporating their concern in so many different waves, if iit were up to me, I would give every single passerby a dollar so that they will have a momentium of a thank you. I can simply say, Hyundai helped her with this one, in the crossfire, I am a pushover for everyone, Sometimes I seem to get that I am not as smart as anyone else, that's okay. All I have wanted to do was help others and myself, this opportunity has given me a all new toll on life, hopefully for a girl that seemed to lose her heart years ago. My father brought up something last night. He said i was a crack up as a child meaning some days I am good, while others those tricks were run of the mill. I don't know whether I told you this one or not, :) Robert Leonard was really good friends with my dad, he was extremely superstitious, and he had a fear of black cats, and of course you know I had to make him less fearful, as we do now, we have plenty of cats, I had a black one I brought up to the shop one time. I can still feel it. :) Anyway, I chased him a 1/5 of a mile. He could run very fast. I didn't quite get to him, but he was good as Gold.
I have been told that I was going to be a good will ambassator. I will gladly take that position. I have been so much of a sleepy depressed person lately and funding for this is been frivolously adorned. Money is an object, but that money in this time and reason of the situation leaves me a little bittersweet.I realize that I won't get a piece of my sums. I have wanted to move a piece of our property and redo and old trailer, Perhaps one which doesn't check out of the good ones to fix, buy furniture and have a cheap depreciated vehcle that could run. I can handle the situation now. It's others that can't handle me because of those small things, and maybe those small things will build the woman back up.
I was blogging last night, my father got on the phone with my niece praise God she's been excepted into Samford University. I am very proud of her, Thank God for her. Anyway, my father was looking over my shoulders and asked me what I was doing. I said blogging. He finds these small things to get out of me or get me off the internet, he's right during the daytime, that's when we get our phone calls from satillite network marketers, Anyway, he said, keep in mind I am thirty years old out of the blue this long strands of commands this father does. I am stuck at the minute oh okay weeks, I defended myself, I spend my day refereeing my mother and uncle. I also have my small things that I just don't like to do because of this depression that makes me feel like I am talking to a brick wall , and anyway. I put my foot down and said. I am thirty years old...it's the only type of intertainment That I have. He came up with this story about my eratic behavior. My mother goes around making threats against herself, and I finally realize those things is what bended up all this negative attitude that I have in mind. Anyway, I am dizzy through this ordeal and I told him I had burning going down my throught and the other wind pipe, IMy mom took me to the doctor yesterday, my blood pressure was 170 which it is moderately high, They doubted me with my symptoms on the blood pressure medications, I told them exactly what Mrs. Seema told me. he had to waste 20$ dolars on a wasted appointments. So anyway, now somethings cooking and I am clueless.
Mrs. King was a great inspiration, over the years I have watched her and smile because she was so wonderful and so amazing. She stood by Martin Luther and fought along side and created great moments in history. Everytime I seen her she was so beautiful and so full of life. She will be greatly missed but not forgotten she had several children who could honestly fall in her footsteps just like
Ms. Parks. I just have to say will all due graditude that they are and will remain in our hearts.
There are something's that cannot go no where behind bars, 8-9 churches throughout the state of alabama was burnt down, I just hope these pieces of garbage will surrender, come out and show yourselves. Why in the hell would anyone want to burn down someones church. T hese people I thin need to come clean and these two will be done away with. Though thechurch servuces won't be taken away, We can start churches up outside or at someone's houses, churches can unite and worship together.
Please keep me in your prayers, :) I have tried so hard to get away from the limelight so long, especially in the state I am in, I do well to slightly and close blindly write these blogs. I want to thank those who have touched their eyes and their nose for the purpose of my afflictions. Pray that my afflictions will be taken away. I need help physically and mentally. I never had been completely jealous of any in my family, I can rest assured knowing that I have tried to live a life in christ and I never asked for the media, just want life that's simplistic, This sis writes a letter to my church in red hill. I haven't been there in a few weeks. I am not worried about it. My mail is swaying away from me.
My father's in charge of the bank roll, unfortunately, I cant have no simple thing from it, It is overdrawn now. Let the waterfalls fall, and that one is now free from the things that have bothered me before. I know that this is a litttle selfish of me, I always have waited patiently for things, One day when I was a child, I wanted my father to fix my bike's chain to be put back on. I sat there patiently waiting, although it was long, he compliementally praised me for being a patient child. I have done so many things becaused I wanted his approval and listening to my mother always disheartened my idea.
So please, pray that I can get over these small boulders that is in my walkway, God bless those eyes of yours to look into the situation. I hope that I can be an independant woman that's ashamed of 1 way she looks, 2. became a psychologist for myself. 3. Feel precochious and wondering. Thank you for your understandings

It's cold

I am hoping to be happy, and I feel and see things that make me tend to wonder hmmm...or is it like meridith baxter and questions answered in an old dindgy mediteranian nasty chair. What is that guy going to do with me next, dove has picked up some BEAUTIFUL IDEA to promote self esteem. I am so proud to be a part of it, but I constantly consistingly getting that bittersweet negative attitude come in. BTW I am wondering how did the modem come out of this computer, hello i just don't know and I hope that the life that I want will come to me. I am still full of anxiety, concentration since my nearsidedness of my hearing has gone a little bit. I am sitting here talking to you, and looking over my glasses. I am going to try to go to the eye doctor some times. I am just happy that my medicine will be weaned off awhile. Don't like antidepressants, specially those that leave the roof of your mouth and teeth filmed over in the doc's office. I am very thankful for you who are helping me. I just want to live a simple life. I have been totemed so far that I hope that will be greased for the sake of pdd. Make that a special E for reasons unknown.
That's life I suppose. No offense to Totems for native amercians, they will keep away evil spirits because I will bless them. I bless you totem poles. Now we are even. You know what's frustrating? Hunh? ehhh! I will have to tell you that bad eyesight, burning throught. will someone bring me some tums smoothies. I don't like to impose on people, I don't like to ask for things, I don't want to ruin anyone's demenor, all I want is a respective small life, now I am bigger than maci's floating banana tree. I am in time square I get to say hello to these newscasters every morning. Love it when someone else interacts, and no I am not psycho, you are about tired of killing me? My people are good outgoing loving people and their lights are really showing it now. I was petting my cat (spooky) earlier, he was going to grab my hand, when he usually does that he sticks his paws into me and then starts agressively biting my hands. He will pop that head back hold on the arms and continously biting at me and kicking the feet scratching me. I think that was a bonus prise. Don't play with your cat, it might get vicious. Perhaps a bit of pinesol under his @$$ and he can move to cuba and take over castor oil's place. Then we can have all the cuban cigarettes and stoggies as long as we live.
Speaking of that, now's the right season to start a healthy lifestyle more like care2, aha, and many more state/governmental campaigns. These benefit those who are in need. We need to talk about life.
The devil gets you when you don't think positive. Have it but don't exuberate it coming out of astericks.

hahaha

I cannot tell this one with a smile on your face, when you are in a dark house, when you are so uncertain about others attitudes and etc. I froze all night, I tried to stay warm in bed. but I just couldn't do it. My mother is the authority over the gas heater. My uncle is down the hall and the other end of the house, I'm cold, and everyone else in the home is cold. If I make an objective to go try to sleep in the living room on a small blue couch. It's funny to so forth and so home to that stupid verbal abusing, "If you don't quit talking about the heat I am just going to kill myself. I am that skanky woman that the whole neighborhood and beyond talk about and yes I am very fragile to the circumstance. I am the one put on television, internet, news, and etc. Maybe I should get that I don't care about what she says attitude. She will walk right into your door saying "are you alright?" I ususally don't like to talk that much. I mean it's ridiculous, she fights with my uncle that is moderately retarded and she is mild in retardation, well anyway, they go back and forth all day long fussing and fuming all day while I try so desperately hard to overcoming what problems I Have and I see people out on the road with their lights for me :) I love you and the feeling is ditto. Ditto to all of you out there that are so beautiful of heart. :) thank you
I have my brother to thank for support, and artman and latch who seem to be good as golden these days. Gary and Karen too, and I am so weird feeling I don't know. When you want to take a shower and the hotwater tends to go so cold it's pretty harsh. I manageto do the best of i can do with what little I can do. Cold water, and now, I am going to tell Jesus how much I love him every night, and I will be greatful and any title other than something negative I can get. I bought the copy of Dr. Phil's weight loss challenge, I hope it will come in handy and a few things that the Oprah says, if you get a knawing feeling in my stomach, that's your body fighting fact and a lady at aglow in montgomery said the word in some terms for fat means very stupid those make great positive notions and phrases for your weight loss goal to go so quickly. I hope for weight loss, I am not making it a major moral standing to conquir. I have to tell you this. Don't live life frivolous. God loves you and me too. There are so many people out there that tries the same thing. If your body is out of shape, you just eat healthy and keep worries out of your head because binges are the worst. Don't pay attention or obsess about your weight too much cause if you do, you tend to go for the binging, don't go for food, go for a walk instead to get some creative juices flowing and peaceful thoughts come into affects. I am my own worst enemy.
Lemme tell you what I have been through these 7months, I am on risperdone, my balance is a little terrible, I am 6 inches away from you looking at the computer because the medicine tampers with eyesight. One thing about this old trailer I live in with my parents, heat authority goes to my mother, and I only care about getting warm. I now have to sleep in the living room because my mother wants to keep her menapausal self wants to stay cold.
Anyway I am getting this borderline disorder vibes. I will say something to my mom, she takes it the wrong way. She makes these stupid threats and herr ass is into a tight. My sister tried to tell me oh so long ago.....and Samantha asks herself why...as she always has been. I am autistic, not retarded, and I have passive personality. Let it go, I just have to let it go..... ohhhhhmmmmmmmmm! yes that means that I need you.
Baths....my wall buddies, observe my entire daily routines, anyway, like I told you I am autistic, and it's very endearing to have wall buddies when certain things go on. My cousin was getting rid of her oldsmobile. Since that time, she laughs because the car would be mostly for me to drive and do whatever else, job, college. goodwill ambassator....anyway, anyway, everyone says she's jealous of me. Why be jealous? What is there to be jealous of, I learned now :) I am not retarded just autistic, which makes me feel wonderful. I understand I am in a non-conventional enviroment. Which isn't
a cup of tea. Especially with bath tactics. I am sorry, but I am not going to freeze my ass off in a cold house. When it's cold outside and inside a home. okay old rusty shack of an old house. I was thinking of one of these old trailors people want to get rid of, and if there is any old trailers that you have, I would love to have it. I hate begging, it's time to get out of the fetal stance and time to make a difference in my life. I have been praying psalms 4 which is a evening prayer for help. I like the words to it. and there is another one psalms 37 for you know talking to public. I got a few little tasks that I need to do. I appreciate all you done for me. Especially the neighbors, candace's across the woods,
the kind people who show their love. I pray when all is over soon, broadcasting network stations are just make me feel better, even the president..
My words about the president...you are not a selfish man i have seen so much good in you through
out these years that you have been in office. What i most respect about you is that you speak to the small people...I hope some recognition from your office that can be shown as well as the democrat party, they have great ideas, as well as independants, so keep that .....Oh what the heck God bless you and I hope the easterbunny would bring me a not so expensive trailer with all proper working things. I hope that I am not being too "selfish" anyway. I could help myself. Thank you Mr,. Bush thank you. BTW let there be a few austere in there fully equipped with you know..all those good things, After all is done, I want a house, moderately small on Lake Martin, I can see it now, meditation sitting near the shore and enjoying the peace and quiet, feeling likea million dollars. Thank you Mr. Bush if you could do this for me. I still want that position as good will ambassator. Thank you Bush Love you .
If you have some prayer requests, well I got some too....ortaga, and people within my home, and those who seemed to get hung in my head for years and couldn't quite reach in and pull the hyundai out. Now it is alright other companies, you can't take the tarp out yet. LOL the Lord blessed me with recognition of being a human being. Those thoughts about are beautiful and just sitting in the sun and having it to sparkle on this lake, it would make me feel wonderful. Btw TED I love you too, keep bringing on new ideas and running it to the republican party, and quit showing the red panties on your face and open your eyes. We are allways blessed in your presence. Thank you everyone. Loveyou all. You can wire my taps anytime, you see how I live and I imagine I am blinded to somethings. Anyway love you ed and ted.

Micheal Bolton

I like this guy very much and happy to know him. :) thank you micael for your charities recently. You have blessed my heart. Thank you handsome. :) BBYE PS I had a crush on him and richard marx in high school.





Bolton was born in 1953 Michael Bolotin to a Jewish family in New Haven, Connecticut. Bolton found his biggest success in his mid-thirties and early forties as a solo vocalist in the "Adult Contemporary" genre. Unbeknownst to many, however, Bolton received his first record label contract at the age of 15 and got his first national exposure in the late seventies with a hard rock band called Blackjack, which also featured one-time Kiss guitarist Bruce Kulick, in which he was known by his birth name. The band once toured with heavy metal singer Ozzy Osbourne. He began recording as Michael Bolton in 1983, after gaining his first major hit as a songwriter, cowriting "How Am I Supposed To Live Without You" for Laura Branigan, previously best-known for singing the disco-pop classic "Gloria". Narrowly missing the pop top 10, Branigan took the song to number one on the Adult Contemporary charts for three weeks. The two sought to work with each other again, and their next of several associations was when Bolton cowrote "I Found Someone" for Branigan in 1985. Her version was only a minor hit, but two years later, Cher resurrected the song, and with it her own singing career. Bolton cowrote several other songs for both singers.

Ironically, one of the prolific songwriter's first major successes as a singer was with his interpretation of someone else's composition, the Otis Redding classic, "(Sittin' On) The Dock Of The Bay." Always interested in soul and Motown classics, that song's success encouraged him to tackle the standard "Georgia On My Mind," with which he had another hit. Most of Bolton's recordings are original material, however, and he has also written songs for such disparate artists as Barbra Streisand, KISS, Kenny Rogers, Kenny G, Peabo Bryson and Patti Labelle. Bolton's early songwriting collaborators included Doug James and Mark Mangold, and as his fame grew he began to cowrite with higher-profile writers such as BabyFace, Diane Warren, and Bob Dylan. As a singer, he has performed with Plácido Domingo, Luciano Pavarotti, Renee Fleming, Patti Labelle, Ray Charles, Percy Sledge, Wynonna Judd, and BB King.

Bolton is the father of three daughters born in the mid-1970s. Their names are Isa, Holly and Taryn.

In 1993, he established the Michael Bolton Foundation (now the Michael Bolton Charities, Inc.) to assist women and children at risk from the effects of poverty and emotional, physical, and sexual abuse. The foundation has provided over $3.7 million in funding to local and national charities.

Bolton also serves as the honorary chairman of Prevent Child Abuse America, the national chairman for This Close for Cancer Research, and a board member for the National Mentoring Partnership and the Joe DiMaggio Children's Hospital.

In March, 2003, Bolton joined with Lifetime Television, Verizon Wireless, and many others to lobby on behalf of the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, urging legislation to provide more assistance for victims of domestic violence, such as affordable housing options.

Bolton has received the Lewis Hine Award from the National Child Labor Committee, the Martin Luther King Award from the Congress of Racial Equality, and the Ellis Island Medal of Honor from the National Ethnic Coalition of Organizations. The Hollywood Chamber of Commerce also recognized Bolton with a star on the "Walk of Fame" for his musical and charitable contributions.

Cat Stevens

I don't feel right about him but she I used to be an excellent artist...still is, but an enigma

Warmth is in the air ahhhhh big release......

I didn't exactly feel good because of stress, insecurities, little anger, little aggrevation. Ted makes the perfect skapegoat....Love ya oh

Ed sent me his lovely newsletter

I love those internet newsletters, I would love to say more...but, anyway, I think that not sarcastically, Ted is a different type a big boy. I like to see the changes of faces in congress when he
sits down on his little black swivel chair with ingrown but hairs come out between his pants as he sits, anyway, Hillery doesn't like it. She just can't get out to see what William is doing. Just take a look when you see him on cnn, larry king lives, and "hardball" with chris matthews. Just look at his face. he
wierd

You are beautiful

I hear the lyrics to this song, saw a clip of the video on the news. I would love to hear this song on the radio. I never heard it the whole way through. I realize with technology, knowing and wanting to act on my thoughts I am stuck with blurred vision, nasty tastes in my mouth; risperdone and cogentin together. I can't fathom that medicine will blur your eyesight. I will come to a conclusion soon I hope. When one has no resources except for a computer. I have overcome so much with 7 months of my life has been great with some stinking memories that I haven't wanted. I have made people laugh, I have made people cry, I need more though. I know that rome wasn't built in a day...but what if it could be? I sit day after day, Full of emotions one day, full of something of the third kind another. There is so much being put into it and so much persuading on the other hand? Okay I see cojo which I really love and I hope one day pretty soon he can give some makeover tips. His hair is great, and has a great sense of style. The lights seem to be so dim and sitting here with you know, I can't wait to get off of risperdone and cogentin. I am trying to be positive. No I am being positive. I want so heavily for a miracle, Can yu make a miracle for me? I just want happiness, and I feel such an uneasiness about some of my counterparts, but then again, they are all in on it. The whole community in this tri-county, I imagine a woman that thought these things would never be possible with certain things. I never knew that so many people cared. Now I do, and I just have been waiting for a miracle just to be loud on a every sight blog, but if I want to talk about it. It's my God given authority.
I want to know when it's going to end. Not my life, no no no....there are places to go and people to see. I am looking forward to new eyes of course they are going to be glasses on my face. Glasses distingish a personality. Yes when things are set forth in your behalf I am stronger. I am not going to use the media we get so caught up with, we aren't going to complain, yell at, and let things bother us.
Since the nervousness that makes me uneasy to a certain.....oh i will just keep praying for healing while doing the part that God gave me. My home is dim I would love to be in a highly lit place. You know everyone has dreams, mine is a peaceful life, but I can't make it peaceful. Woody Allen or Stern can I come live with you. I just want to be free and protected. That's all I want and a persute of peace, my independance as human being. If i am a posterchild for mental health that would be alright too.
I have an artificial conscience. I hope that they will stay out of the hand. I hope that I aint got some woman out there mimicing my pdd sweetness. Anyway. I got to go. Live terribly I wonder why no one will intervene for me. Probably no use. I don't feel safe with certain people and I don't feel comfortable anymore. Thank you God. I know who the little imposter can help me on those things. I want u to pray for me in heavy prayer. my resources is the media blowing all over the place, a president walks his stride with pdd. I am lonely. I think one certain one ;) which I call no name, but I pray that he can do something easy for me so I can get organized, out of negativity and be healed. Thank you for reading. Which someone would keep his eyes off the papers, and give something solid so one doesn't have to be
perfect, or any or the above. I know certain people are egnimatic. You can't read them and the sensing that I get is something of money and the purpose of humiliation for perosnal gain. I have my family, I hope and I hope that I can get well soon. I feel so rundown and lethargic, with this medicine and the dimming of lights and I am hoping I can make a doctor's appointment tommorrow. I get in the seat for gaining my weight back and from someone, said I had a brain tumor, I hope they are only joking and not truthful. Can I ask this one respect. In church can I have a decent mind and not filled with garbage.. Jokes haha funny can go for some other day, but right now, I am wishing for a excellent job, I want to be free of all negaitive words .
I made a slight cute remarik to my dad, he says don't act stupid, and then on the gun, my mother says these stupid things like "I feel like killing myself just for making a matter of opinion and someone's clock went off. It's a life line of these comments that can be helpful to a reconstructive mind. Gee, I
said to myself, why have I never had any esteem. Let a child express themselves for what, let them draw pictures express their feelings, and I want you to have a better relationship with your child for as long as you can. No mother should speak this way to their child. Spend time with them even when they are in your gut. Don't bring the speach that a person doesn't want to listen to and walk away if someone who puts you down, others definitely have a problem with them not you. If you are pdd treat it as a gift and not a disability. God bless you and be with you.

Do pick up trucks bend it like Becca?

10) "I think with a lifetime appointment to the Supreme Court, you can't play, you know, hide the salami, or whatever it's called." --urging President Bush to make public Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers's White House records

9) "You know, the Republicans are not very friendly to different kinds of people. They're a pretty monolithic party. Pretty much, they all behave the same, and they all look the same. ... It's pretty much a white Christian party.'' --speaking about the lack of outreach to minority communities by political parties

8) "I still want to be the candidate for guys with Confederate flags in their pickup trucks."

7) "I'm a metrosexual." –employing the buzz phrase for straight men who are in touch with their feminine sides, then later admitting he didn't know what the term means

6) "We've gotten rid of (Saddam Hussein), and I suppose that's a good thing."

5) "The idea that the United States is going to win the war in Iraq is just plain wrong."

4) "This president is not interested in being a good president. Sponsored Links
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He's interested in some complicated psychological situation that he has with his father."

3) "Now that we're on dog pee, we can have an interesting conversation about that. I do not recommend drinking urine…but if you drink water straight from the river, you have a greater chance of getting an infection than you do if you drink urine." —teaching an eight-grade science class in La Crosse, Wisconsin

2) "You think people can work all day and then pick up their kids at child care or wherever and get home and still manage to sandwich in an eight-hour vote? Well Republicans, I guess can do that. Because a lot of them have never made an honest living in their lives."

1) "Not only are we going to New Hampshire ... we're going to South Carolina and Oklahoma and Arizona and North Dakota and New Mexico, and we're going to California and Texas and New York! And we're going to South Dakota and Oregon and Washington and Michigan. And then we're going to Washington, D.C. to take back the White House, Yeeeeeaaaaaargh!" --Iowa concession speech (Click here for audio and remixes of the Dean scream) Howard Dean Humor
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Free Gas

I don't know what has got into me, I am belching up an eggy taste and massively passing gas. It's irritating and embarrassing. Would'nt just be a cracker if I was on television doing this, great to know that I am not. Everyone has their problems, emotional level, does that mean that the patch of hives i have downloaded on the internet. What else is aggrevatingly for chest pains while I breath, and when I go to sleep at night and wishing this bodily ping pong would get off my last nerves, I was laughing at it. It's totally embarrasing. I say cute things to throw it off course, it's still there and I want it gone, and I hold no position to get this oprah thing off of my mind. I thought it was wrong. I am hoping it was just some recreation of footage instead of the real thing, even it were the missing grape, I wouldn't put it past the media making or recreating the field and the mountains. Little teeny weeny tied off, but will live.. Anyway, that's not scaring this multifunctional retard... I will slowly get over it.
I am ready to get married, eventhough I am afraid of him,....not...I just don't know which one is which is it? I don't know, blurry eyesight, have to bend my head down in order to share my thoughts with you. Maybe I can tommorrow get some advice on having a happy long life. I keep hearing excerpts, but I think i will be okay, that retarded red head...:) okay I feel great. I think at this moment I am those economically safe vechiles, well my exaust pipe just dont want to go, you know what I mean.
Anyway, If those of you who pray please listen up pray for these too. I cannot fathom how many need to be prayed for..just make it a global prayer where everyone can have a blessing. sometimes I miss what blessings are, blessings are least noticed in everyday life, I believe everyone gets more than enough everyday like camera's swinging in a bush speech, or seeing howard dean the guy who wanted democrats to go after the big guys and their pick up trucks. He wants to forget, because he is a
smart big wig over there.
Anyway about free gas come to tallassee, alabama and hook your gas spouts to me. Btw, I think it's safer than ethonal and hydrogen vehicles, just get a little sun in your eyes. Thank you Tallassee, Alabama and for the governor, these cool cats, and for immediate family, My sister in law has come up with a ministry for babies....as well as the world with their bids. If you want to know we are bewitched and some other ones are ready for their white diamonds. :) Take care and have a nice day, night, flight and etc. Don't forget to pray or tell someone you love them, time is to precious to cry over spilled milk.
If you do cry over the spilled milk, the God is going to see to it that a cat will clean it up. :)

1.